Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Family Picture Milestone

Well, it is finally official. We took family pictures with out Elaine. It has been 5 years since our last professional family picture. It was a very emotional experience for me. In those 5 years we have buried a daughter and added a son and another daughter. It was necessary, but still hard to do without one. How can you take a picture of a family, knowing not all are present? That was my big struggle. Yes, we try to remember Elaine and represent her in some small way, but it just doesn't seem like a "real" family picture.

I know that many others struggle with this as well. It came down to not being fair to my other children. I don't love Elaine more than them , I just miss her more (duh!). We needed more than just the occasional snapshot. This one is for the wall.

I have added a few more of the others. The kids weren't very cooperative, which was unfortunate because the colors were so very pretty. Thank you to Mary who put up with us and took the darling pictures! It was a hard and emotional day. A milestone that I am glad to be through, for now. I haven't posted until now because I was still in denial or something. It's been nearly a month since these were taken. Sorry I ahve dragged my feet about posting about this. I have a bunch of cute ones of Vi and Ashton that aren't on the computer yet. I'll share them sometime...

Since we are on the subject of Elaine, I have been pondering what to do this year for her Angel Day and Birthday. She would be turning 8 and getting baptized. It will be 5 years since her passing on. Any ideas what to do to mark the day? I'd love every one's input. Thanks so much!


Jake & Stephanie Ellinger said...

You have such a cute family. You also did a nice job with the colors that you chose. My mom lost my sister when she was two. She always struggled with family pictures as well. We're grateful for all that you do for IHH.


Christina said...

The pictures look so nice. I really like the "one for the wall". The Buzz is so sweet to think of Elaine.

Maybe you could go to the temple and do baptisms on Elaine's birthday?

hugs & prayers,

Janice said...

The pictures are beautiful Melissa. I'm glad you decided to do one. Hope you have a great Thanksgiving. We will be thinking about our family who lives far away. Hope to see you all soon.

Noni Andrew said...

We hope you have a great Thanksgiving. We love the pictures. If we could see a little further I bet Elaine was there someplace. God bless you and help you feel comfort as you live each day missing the one you can't see. The rest of the family will help you iam sure. We think about you and look at your pictures every day. Love you

Paul and Joanne said...

Look, I can post a comment!! Yippie for me!

VLB said...

Very cute! Can I ask you something about the blog? Does Violet read those books all by herself or do you read them to her? She is reading more advanced than Callie. I wish I had more time and energy to read to them more! I do read to them, but it usually quick. Hope you are well and Happy Thanksgiving!

Cadie said...

Violet's hair is so long! She is getting more and more gorgeous every time I see her! Elaine is noticeably absent and although I don't know exactly how you feel I certainly can sympathize and wish so much that you never had to suffer the loss that you did. But you are an amazing person, and I am so lucky that you are my aunt! My BABY aunt! Love and hugs!!! I like the idea of the baptisms for Elaine since she would have been doing that.

VLB said...

Hi Melissa,

I just read your blogpost. I am sorry that day was an emotional one! What I am doing this year for my lost brother is going to the gravesite and lighting a candle for about 5 mintues and singing Silent Night quietly and meditating about my memories of him. I love you! Keep hanging in there when times are tough!

LambFam said...

I love your pictures. I think it is neat that you represent Elaine because even though she isn't physically in them every time I see the buzz I think of her so she is still emotionally in them.

Melissa said...

The book list is a list of books that have been read to Vi. Not ones she has read alone!

Palmer family said...

We got your Christmas card in the mail today. THANKS! I think your family picture turned out really cute. You all look great! I am sure it was hard (I can only imagine) but I am glad you took that step and have a cute, current picture of you guys. The kids are getting so big so fast! Time flys.
About Elaine's day---I like the baptisms for the dead idea someone else mentioned. What a fabulous idea! If I think of anything on my own, I will let you know.
Take care.